Disney!

I know, I'm a slacker. I pitifully acknowledge this every time I log into blogger and see the date of my last blog. I think I left off around Father's day. Mid-June? Sounds about right. Let's try and knock out a few key points here in the next few blogs and get caught up.

Disclaimer-I took a few HUNDRED photos during this trip, I promise to limit the number I include in this post minimal. And by minimal, I mean less than 20.

We decided at the end of last year we were FINALLY ready to tackle Disneyland. Our projected trip would be June 2015. We agreed on an amount for saving each month and opened a separate bank account, naming it "Vacation Fund".

The overtime started picking up and before we knew it, we were able to move our trip up an entire year! It was tight, we were consistent, and it totally paid off. We surprised the kids, they have absolutely NO IDEA where we were going. The car ride there wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been. I was armed with a load of dollar store supplies just in case, but we found a scavenger hunt that kept us occupied for a good part of the 7 hour ride.

We arrived just in time for dinner the first night, and explored Downtown Disney. We stayed off site the first night, and ended up at Bubba Gump Shrimp for the our first real meal since we left that morning. The atmosphere was awesome and we truly had a blast. We made it back to our room just in time to see the fireworks from our hotel room window.

We really spared no cost when it came to this trip, and had our days jam packed full of surprised and exciting things to do with the kids. We purchased tickets to BOTH Disneyland and California Adventure. We started our first morning in Disneyland (and met Goofy right away!) and after a few rides, we left around noon to go to "Ariel's Grotto" for lunch. The girls were speechless when they got to meet 5 princesses up close and personal! They were all beautiful, it truly amazing.

We decided to spend the rest of the day in California Adventure, and enjoyed many of the rides. Halfway through the day we stopped to dance with Phineas and Ferb, the kids got a kick out of their street show. We had prime seating for the parade, and since they were the only kids in the area we were sitting in, they got plenty of up close and personal attention!

The kids were plum exhausted by 8pm, so tired, that my son fell asleep in my arms. Believe me, I live for those moments, except when I'm exhausted myself and have 5 miles to walk. We stopped at one last ride and my son slept through the entire thing, including getting on and off the ride! Once we got to the new hotel, we checked in and took the glass elevator to our room. We showered and settled in just in time for the fireworks show.

The next morning the girls were awoken by a personal phone call from Mickey Mouse! They couldn't believe it was him, and he promised to see them later. We spent most of our day at Disneyland and met even more characters. I was just as shocked as Laila when there was no line to meet the princesses, we got there early enough there was no wait. Her dreams came true when she met Jasmine, her favorite princess since she even learned who princesses were. My eyes welled up with tears as she hugged her. We managed to see the last bit of Tangled's show, and Kenadi was also in heaven. We spent the day riding all sorts of rides, eating expensive food, gettingt face paintings and soaking up our time there. We drove cars, rode in spaceships, and tackled roller coasters that even made ME scream. There were only a small handful of attractions we didn't see, and most of them were because the kids were too small to ride them. We made it to the parade in Disneyland and the girls got to see Anna and Elsa of Frozen. It was official, our trip was complete.

Little did they know, we had one more surprise for them! We planned dinner at Goofy's Kitchen, where they met another bunch of characters! The night ended so blissfully, I don't know that it could have gone any better. We discussed the length of our trip before planning it, and decided 2 days at the parks would be about all our kids could handle. With early bedtimes and Laila's unpredictable blood sugar, we didn't want to risk ruining a great thing.

The kids haven't stopped talking about the trip since we were there, and we'd love to go again in the future. Making their dreams come true is worth any cost in my book, and I'm so grateful for the opportunity we had to share that with them.

Until next time, all my love.

Happy Father's Day!

Yesterday was Father's Day. Thanks to my poor planning skills, Dustin's gift is on the truck for delivery.

Today.

A day late.

Normally, I'm at the top of my game. I usually purchase something fabulous, wrap it and have hand-made cards from the kids waiting for him, complete with a breakfast fit for a king. I managed to nail the breakfast, but the gift, not so much.

Hopefully it arrives today and he loves it.

Since I felt like such a crappy wife, I did my best to make it up to him. We got dressed and headed into town. The kids and I decided lunch at one of daddy's favorite restaurants would do just the trick. We dined on sushi at Kona Grill. To our surprise, it was happy hour all day! We ordered enough food for an army and every last bit of it was delicious. We spent the rest of the afternoon laughing and shopping, picking up a few last things for our upcoming trip.

After a long afternoon out, we came home and I made Dustin's favorite dinner.

Lasagna.

Everyone else in our house hates it. I hope he enjoys having the entire pan to himself! Good thing it freezes well!

I found time to call my dad late in the evening and the kids all took turns wishing him a wonderful day.

My kids are so blessed to have such a wonderful father in their lives every day. Dustin may not be the perfect man, but he's perfect for them. He's living, breathing proof that there are good men out there. He works hard for us, and stops at nothing to insure we have everything we need all of the time. He's constantly reaching for the next best thing, and bettering himself in the process.

Until next time. All my love.

Flags and Fireworks!

Today, I got a little ambitious. I agreed to let the kids do a craft, which then turned into two. And any time paint is involved, it takes twice as long to clean as it does to actually paint.

Go figure.

Anyway, we made flags out of old egg cartons (2.5 dozen size), some cheap paint and foam brushes. The kids had a blast, here is a picture of the finished product!

Left: Dustin, Top Right: Laila,
Bottom Right, Kenadi

We also made "fireworks" with some leftover canvases, toilet paper rolls, and more cheap paint. The kids thought it was the coolest thing and made an even bigger mess with this craft than the first. I had to control myself from helping them (ok, doing it myself because it was a giant mess) but it turned out to be a lot of fun. Here's the girls final product!

Left: Kenadi, Right: Laila

A big "Thank you!" to the moms who pin all this stuff on Pinterest, so I can just copy it! 

Until next time. All my love

RAOK!

Random Acts of Kindness!

I decided this summer was not going to be wasted. No way. Not if I had anything to say about it! I've planned multiple activities each week, making it a point to include weekly Random Acts of Kindness (ROAK). As my children age, I hope they find it makes their hearts happy to love and give to others.

I dedicated Friday's to be our ROAK day, and yesterday just got away from me. Between baking and taking care of the kids, I forgot to get out and do something kind for someone. This morning, I made sure it was our top priority. The kids look forward to it each week, this being week three, they decided it should be something extra special!

I'll admit, I'm a sucker for five-bucks (aka Starbucks). It's one thing I indulge in that I rarely have to share with anyone. Even though it costs an astronomical amount for a customized coffee (venti cafe mocha, whole milk, no whip, 2 pumps vanilla and toffee nut drizzle-just in case you were wondering), it's my husband's equivalent of flowers "just because". He doesn't bring me coffee often, and when he does, it's like he has moved mountains. I don't spoil myself with shoes or clothes, coffee. It's the way to my heart.

Now that I've moved completely off track in a coffee-induced daydream, I'm back to reality. Sorry.

Not sorry.

Coffee is definitely dream worthy.

So this morning. Coffee was an absolute must. Any time I'm up before 7 am it's practically a given. Yes, even 6:59am. I promised the kids chocolate milk and donuts if they got ready fast enough. Nothing like an ultra non-nutritious breakfast promise to light a fire under their butts. We decided to try the new Starbucks in Fry's since we frequent the one in Basha's at least twice a week. We grabbed a few things, fruit, cereal, and the promised donuts and milk and headed for the checkout. After paying, I separately purchased a $25 gift card to Starbucks and got in line to order. I ordered my drink and paid. Despite the rather unfriendly woman behind the counter, I explained I picked up this gift card and would like to leave it for the few customers behind me, but the deal was she could not tell them who paid for their drinks. Easy enough.

The kids were giggling and could hardly contain their excitement! My heart was pumping fast as we waited for my mocha (which, in case you care, tasted like burnt ass). I could hear the lady explain to the next person in line their drink had been paid for. The woman in line kept staring at me. I ignored her. I sat my kids at a table and got their so-called breakfast ready and pretended to be absolutely clueless.

We watched as another person came up and received a free drink. And another. And another. The girls were trying so hard not to stare, but watching the looks on the customers faces followed by a smile made it so much fun! I should have brought popcorn, it turned into quite the show! One lady told her daughter all about it. Another man told his son he couldn't believe it. My heart almost exploded right then and there.

It.

Was.

Amazing.

My hopes for the future are shiny and bright. I may not be able to do much. Some days more than others. But today, today was awesome. One day these sweet babies of mine will grow up. Move out. Move on. And hopefully these RAOK have not been lost on their hearts.

Until next time. All my love.

Late Night Ramblings.

This blog has been weighing heavily on my heart lately. I used to update it frequently, and then as my children grew, it became less and less. I found myself wrapped up endlessly in them, and the amount of time I had for myself has slowly dwindled away to next to nothing. What little time I do have alone, I ponder over the idea of blogging again. Would I be any good at it? Would anyone want to read it? Maybe it's time for something new...

Where have I been? Well, I'm not sure that really matters. I'm here now. It's just after 10pm on a Wednesday night and the whole house is quiet. I can't sleep. Hell, I can't even relax. Not at a time like this. We're on the brink of huge changes around here. But before I dig deep into the depths of my soul, I digress.

An entire school year has passed since my last blog. Kenadi has completed kindergarten, to say she did great wouldn't quite do her justice. She received more awards than I can count on my two hands, I'm the picture of a proud mother. My sweet girl adapts to anything with grace and beauty, she's a true middle child. I couldn't love her more for it even if I tried. Laila, my sweet sugar baby, has completed her 3rd grade year. I'm ecstatic to report she made honor roll three of out of four quarters, and Principals List the last quarter. I know how challenging dealing with diabetes is for all of us, but she makes it look easy. Straight A's, another soccer season under her belt, and she's glad it's summertime.

Looking back, my last post was sometime in August. Whew, August.

We had a stellar birthday and holiday season, Dustin was actually home for the first time in years, and celebrating Christmas as a family was everything I hoped it would be. Snowflake made her debut December 1 and wreaked havoc on my household yet again. I know I complain sometimes, but I don't know that I'll ever get tired of seeing the smiles on the kids' faces every morning of December when they find her and laugh over her silly antics. It's not easy, coming up with 25 new ideas each year, but it's certainly worth it.

No, I haven't forgotten about my son. That boy of mine, he sure gives me a run for my money. I'm pleased to announce Little Dustin has been potty trained for a few months now, including overnight. It makes for a much happier Dustin, and not having to pay for diapers makes for a much happier bank account, too. I won't lie, I left the unused pull-ups in his underwear drawer, not because he needs them, but because I can't bring myself to rid the house of the last shred of baby left in it. Yes, there's one last diaper in there, too. Don't judge me. Would I have done things differently if I truly thought he was my last one? Maybe. Probably.

Changes. I did mention things were changing around here. Starting with me. I decided settling for "good-enough" wasn't "good-enough" for me. It has been 12 years since I graduated high school, and 11 years since I dropped out of college after barely completing one full year. I have a husband that supports me and our family, but the "what-if's?" kept taunting me. I bit the bullet and enrolled in an online college. I laughed, cried, and persisted. I'm now 4 classes in and have declared a major. Wait for it.

Addictions counseling.

Seems fitting.

Changes. We're not finished. Our house, our home. We're in the process of selling it. In fact, we have less than a month to be packed and moved out. Where will we go? Your guess is as good as mine. We are staying in Maricopa, we just don't have an address yet. This is where the stress begins to creep up the back of my neck, behind my ears, and rushes down my chest. Don't you worry, we're house hunting again on Monday.

Dustin and I are just days away from celebrating our 8 year wedding anniversary, and I'm about a month out from my big 3-0. We decided now is as good a time as any to do all the neat things we've always waited to do for no real reason. For example: I shot a gun! We went to the shooting range. We've been both beer and wine tasting. We have been to a couple concerts and have bought tickets to a handful more. I'm checking things off my bucket list like there's no tomorrow. Isn't that the point? No more letting life pass me by.

This summer has proved to be a lot less hectic than last summer. Ok, that was a lie. It's ridiculously busy. We have plans almost daily. It would also be a lie if I said I didn't love it. Crafts. Random Acts of Kindness. Movies. Play dates. Family visiting. It's only a few weeks into summer and we've barely had a day "off" yet.

Just how I like it.

Did someone say Disney? Oh, yes. We're surprising the kids with a trip to Cali in just 19 short days. They have no idea we're going, and keeping it a secret has proved harder than either Dustin or I had ever imagined! Did you catch the part where I have to be moved out of this house in less than a month? Yep. Disneyland and moving in the same month. Because I'm a glutton for punishment.

Am I rambling? I'm rambling. Boy, does it feel good. The Counting Crows are blaring in my headphones and my neck is sore from the way I'm sitting, but I don't even care. It feels good to do something for me. I've decided I need to break away from this blog and make a second one just for me. I can't promise to keep this one updated with our family shenanigans. I can't even promise to keep the other one updated. But I can promise to try.

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50 Days of Summer Fun!

Summer can be such a drag, I remember as a child spending the summer home and being bored out of my mind. I knew we weren't taking a vacation this year, so I really had to step it up! I refuse to let the kids waste away in front of the television, computer, or video games, so I decided to create a fun, inexpensive way to keep us busy this summer! My inspiration came from Pintrest. I realize you're not surprised, but that's okay, you don't have to be.

I decided to create a jar and fill it with fun things to do this summer, each day letting the kids draw something from the jar! I was prepared to fill in the gaps with weekly visits to the museum for kids' day, monthly visits to Home Depot, weekly trips to the movies for $.50 movies. Needless to day, I was a little over ambitious!

I did a little research and brainstorming and came up with 50 ideas of things we could accomplish that would be fun, educational, and would help give back to the community. I took photos each day and will create a master album for the kids to keep, full of memories of our summer 2013. I'm pleased to report we finished all 50 activities, even though by the end, I think we were all completely exhausted! The kids truly enjoyed it, and they still can't pick their favorite thing we did!

I've had many people ask for my list, so here it is, in the order we completed them! My advice if you choose to do this: Make a smaller list!

1. Splash Pad
2. Sea Life Aquarium
3. Donuts for Breakfast
4. Finger Painting
5. Cerreta Candy Company
6. Play a Board Game
7. Bubble Art
8. Pajama Day
9. Pudding Body Paint
10. Make and Deliver Dinner to Someone
11. Bake Cookies
12. Build a Fort
13. Sidewalk Chalk Art
14. Ding Dong Ditch Cupcakes
15. Tempe History Museum
16. Send Someone a Care Package
17. Donate to a Food Bank
18. Decorate T-Shirts
19. Water Balloon Fight
20. Hall of Flame Museum
21. Make Ice Cream
22. Movie Night with Popcorn
23. Splash of Color
24. Build-A-Bear
25. Make Play-Doh
26. Pay for Someone's Order at McDonalds
27. Camping in the Living Room
28. Send Someone a Hand Made Card
29. Out for Ice Cream
30. Visit Police Station
31. Children's Museum of Phoenix
32. Arizona Museum for Youth
33. Tie-Dye a T-Shirt
34. Visit Downtown and Take Photos
35. Wash Car
36. Storytime
37. Drawn on a Mustache for the Day
38. At Home Science Experiments
39. Visit a Fire Station
40. Spa Day
41. Get Library Cards
42. School Supply Shopping
43. Arizona Museum of Natural History
44. Bowling
45. Potato Stamp Art
46. Microwave Ivory Soap
47. Lemonade Stand
48. Phoenix Zoo
49. Chandler Museum
50. Jambo Indoor Amusement Park

Here are photos from some of our favorite activities (in no particular order)! I chose our 10 favorites!

Build-A-Bear!

Pudding Body Paint!

Ding-Dong-Ditch Cupcakes!

Fire Station!

Mustaches!

Police Station!

Phoenix Zoo!

Finger Paint!

Sea Life Aquarium!

Thanks to everyone who followed along, offered ideas, and gave support and encouragement! 

Until next time, all my love.

Back To School!

Kenadi and Laila by the school sign!
(I do one of these each year)

Yesterday, school started up again in Maricopa! Part of me has been counting the days since summer break started, but now that it's here and the girls are really gone, my heart aches for them! I like having them here, close by me, even if they do drive me nuts.

Sisters!

I took the girls in to school yesterday morning so they could have breakfast, and after a few hic-ups were ironed out, the day went on pretty well. I still can't believe how old they're getting, it seems like it's happening right before my eyes. I'm impressed with how smoothly the morning went at home, the kids were so excited they were up before my alarm even went off! We'll see how long that lasts! =)

3rd Grade!

Laila's yearly photo!

Kindergarten!

Kenadi's yearly photo!

Until next time, all my love.

It's been a while...

My heavens, it's been months since my last post! I guess I have some serious catching up to do! I've been so busy I can't even remember where I left off! I find it funny that my last post was titled "Where Have I Been?" Obviously I've slacked in the blogging department. I'm hoping once things get back on track and on a decent schedule at home, that I will be back on a regular blogging agenda again. Truth be told, I sort of miss it!

My last post was nearly 4 months ago, in April! Wow! Let's take a look back over the last few months and see what's been happening around the Smith residence.

May: What a great month May turned out to be! Laila finished up soccer and also wrapped up the school year! Finishing second grade was exciting, in addition to the award she won at school, she also received a letter in the mail congratulating her on her excellent test scores. Despite her diabetes, she continues to excel. She makes me so proud!

June: We really let it rip in June, with summer in full swing we were pulling events out of our jar of fun almost daily! (I promise to do a blog about this another time). We started the month at our favorite place- Home Depot! We made crafts there, and also at Lakeshore Learning Store with friends. We celebrated 7 years of marriage, made a trip to Sedona, and more!

Snuggles from my main squeeze!

Blood donation #4 of the year!

Happy Anniversary!

It was great to catch up with a friend from home!

Sedona!

My sweet angels in Sedona!

July: Double birthday month! I turned 26! (Haha, shut up!) and my son turned 3! I still can hardly believe he's that old! We spent the month plowing through our of summer fun, it was a month crammed full of surprises for the kids, and for me! The month didn't start out so well, my van has had a few brake issues and even though it's less than 2 years old, Dodge won't compensate in any way. So, after dealing with all the lame issues that have come along with that, the rest of the month was fantastic! My dad visited and I was able to get a little alone time on my birthday. I finally took the kids to get their photos done and we almost finished the jar of summer fun!

All 3 kids crammed into Dustin's little Toyota!

My painting! I still don't believe I painted this!

My birthday flowers! Thank you, soul sister!

My girls at Rustler's Rooste, my dinner choice!

Photos of the kids! Finally! Just waiting to be hung on the wall!

I think that brings us to about current, minus the 50 days of summer fun. I will do a blog about that another time, I'm pretty tired, but glad to have at least got back on the blogging horse again! Thank you to all my religious readers, I hope to be writing more in the near future!

Until next time, all my love.

Where Have I Been?

Another 2 months have flown by and more promises to keep up on my blog have been broken. I'm not sure anyone really reads it, but I'll still apologize nonetheless.

I'm sorry.

So, where have I been? That's a good question. I'm not even sure I know the answer. I've been around, keeping busy. Many times I've opened Blogger and contemplated writing, and closed it right back up. So many things have been on my mind, I don't even know where to begin sometimes. Writing used to be an outlet for me, and now it just causes me anxiety.

Let's get back to business and find out what's been going on in the Smith household, shall we?

Laila just lost her 8th tooth yesterday! I find it so hard to believe she's growing so fast right before my eyes. I remember all the stages of her life like it was just yesterday, watching her bloom and blossom is such a blessing. She is enjoying school, with just under 6 weeks until summer vacation left to go, she's excited to wrap up this school year. I met recently with the nurse and principal and already requested her teacher for next year, once school resumes in the fall her 504 meeting will take place and she'll officially be in 3rd grade!

This past month Laila has taken on a new adventure: Soccer! She absolutely loves playing, she has a great time and really enjoyed her first game this past weekend. Her team name is Roma's and the color they wear is rust orange. Only she can make such a melancholy color look so beautiful. She started her first game as center forward, I was so proud! Her sugars have been wonderful, the exercise really helps keep her numbers down. During her first game we checked nearly 10 times in just an hour, thankfully I was prepared to keep her sugars under control.

Kenadi has been enjoying the fact that I've been babysitting for my neighbor the last 2 weeks, she loves having friends over to play! She completed a 6 week sports program through the city and loved it! Dustin took her each week, she played soccer, basketball, and t-ball. Hopefully in the winter she will be able to join a soccer team, I know she'll love it as much as Laila.

I filled out the enrollment packet for Kenadi to start Kindergarten in the fall, she'll attend the same school as Laila. I also requested her teacher for Kenadi, providing she passes her early enrollment test for school. Her birthday is 9 days past the cutoff for Kindergarten, so she'll test in early June.

The school offered a movie package through the local cinema, 50 cent movies! I bought 3 sets of tickets, and Dustin will take the girls to a movie each week for 10 weeks this summer. I'm glad they've made this available locally, the girls will look forward to it and it will be a great way to beat the heat, and the daddy-daughter bonding time is just an added bonus!

My son. Where do I begin? That boy is hell on two feet. From the second he wakes up in the morning until the moment he falls asleep at night, it's out of control crazy. He knows no boundaries! He runs, jumps, screams, and plays unlike anything I've ever seen before. My son is loud and obnoxious, and I love every minute of it! He's still a little too young to join any sports, but hopefully in the fall I'll be able to enroll him in a one or two day a week preschool program.

Hopefully, one day, I'll get back into the swing of blogging again. It soothes my soul. Until I find that happy rhythm again....peace.

Blessed

I've never been know to be overly religious. I have my beliefs, though it's something I've struggled with often throughout my life, and that's that. I pray. Not as much as I should, but more often than not. I try to do the right thing, I help when I can, I give what I have, and I teach the same to my children.

Lately, I've been feeling like garbage. I have felt tired, angry, used, and hurt. I go above and beyond, I'm willing to rearrange my whole day to help someone even when I get nothing in return, and still feel like I'm all alone at the end of the day. A simple kind gesture goes a long way. This may sound selfish, but with all give and no take, it tires a person out. In addition to feeling this way, I've been feeling down about my life, like I'm not measuring up.

After a long day of running myself to the ground, beating myself up about how I'm not good enough, I finally sat down to recap my day. I ask my girls at the end of each day if they did something nice for someone with out being asked, if they helped anyone, and what their favorite part of the day was. I love hearing them share their stories of generosity and kindness, it makes me feel like a million bucks. Then, like a bolt of lightning, it hit me.

I am good enough. In fact, I'm freaking fabulous!

I typically a "Debby Downer", I can ruin a good mood in a heartbeat. I always see the glass as half empty, there's never enough time, and I find myself constantly miserable. It's easy to look at my life and see how far I have to go, instead of looking back at the mountains I've climbed and the treacherous roads behind me. I've spent months trying to force friendships that will never be, and right in front of my face are people who want to be in my life, who want to be my friend, and accept me and the baggage that comes with me.

I've prayed, talked, screamed, and cried, and finally decided it's time for me to be my own priority. Since this decision, I've come to the following conclusions about my life:

1. I'm married to the most amazing man: Trust me, there are days I've considered walking away, giving up, just throwing in the towel, and on those days, Dustin tells me I'm beautiful. He reminds me why I chose this life, and he lifts me up in ways I could never do for myself. He may not be perfect, but he's perfect for me. I feel safe, both emotionally and physically, and ready to climb the next mountain as long as he's by my side.

2. I have a house to call home: I complain my house isn't big enough, I feel like we're busting at the seams, outgrowing everything from clothes to beds to this house. This certainly isn't my dream home, in fact, I felt rushed when we bought it and didn't even really want this house. Three children, two adults, and one dog all crammed into a 1400 square foot house is not how I imagined my life. Then again, I never dreamed I'd be a stay at home mom in the suburbs of Arizona, either. Even though we're feeling cramped, we have a clean, safe environment for our family to live. There is no landlord who can make us move on short notice, because we own this house; we've never had our water turned off, or our electric disconnected, and we even have the expanded cable package, and that's something to be proud of.

3. My children are healthy: Yes, Laila has Type 1 Diabetes, but she's healthyAt the time of Laila's diagnosis, I was sure my world was ending. With the help of amazing doctors and my supportive husband, we've got her sugars under control and she's doing great!. Aside from the hurdles we've already passed, my kids are doing just fine. To know each night as I tuck them in that they are in no danger of harm is a blessing so big it almost brings me to tears. Having them in my life means more to me than I can express, and knowing they're healthy is breathtaking.

4. My husband has a good job: Dustin and I decided together I would be a stay at home mom. Not only do I change diapers and cook meals, I also pay the bills. He brings home the bacon, I fry it in the pan. My job is  to make his salary stretch as far as I can, and thankfully it's not as hard as it could be. He's constantly picking up overtime to help with the extras, and the benefits through his employer is amazing. Health coverage is a must-have in our house, with Laila's condition, the supplies would cost more than he makes in a month if we didn't have the coverage we have now. He works with great people, his schedule is consistent, and the pay is enough to keep us afloat. We don't always have lots of money left over at the end of each month, we still pay our bills paycheck to paycheck, but there's always a cushion to fall back on, and it's refreshing to know as long as he's willing to stay, his job isn't going anywhere.

5. I have a budget: This may sound silly, but it coincides with the above statement. I have a budget for food, gas, clothing, and other things. I was grumbling to a friend today about my lack of funds to feed a family of five, and how making it stretch is difficult sometimes. Indeed, it is, but we've never been hungry, cold, or without what we need. I've learned to prioritize my life and always put my kids and husband first. I can go without getting my hair cut this week just knowing my pantry and freezer will be full, and I can skip going to lunch with friends if it means signing my oldest up for soccer or paying for preschool instead. When there's extra, I find myself picking up little surprised for my kids, accidentally (ok, on purpose) not packing my husband's lunch so he can enjoy something special at work from a place only in town. Every once in a while, when I do treat myself to a coffee or lunch with friends, it's extra sweet, because I feel like I earned it.

6. I have friends: I mentioned feeling like I was forcing friendships that will never be, and ignoring those right in front of me who want to be a part of my life. I have resolved to change this part of my life, it's important to have healthy relationships as examples for my children. I've brushed people off, canceled plans, and ignored invites because I was worried they weren't genuine, and I would hate if someone did that to me. I look forward to making new friends for myself, and my kids, and spending my time enjoying my life instead of sulking around feeling bad about it. I have best friends, friends I would trust with my life, and they're irreplaceable. No, they all don't live close by, but when we can, we visit each other and pick up right where we left off. Those are the friendships that will last a lifetime.

7: I have great parents: My mom died nearly 16 years ago, but she's not been lost. Her lessons, her words, they're with me always. My dad, yes, he gets on my nerves and under my skin, but that's what parents do, isn't it? Together, they've instilled in me a passion to raise my children in such a way that makes this world a better place. They will be polite, generous, smart, kind, and wholesome. They will make me proud, they already do, and I know part of it is because of me, and because of my parents. I hope my parents know what they mean to me, and I make them proud.

The buck doesn't stop here, there is so much more to my life than the few things I posted here tonight, these are just the things that keep me grounded. These are the things I need in my life, and the things I need to remind myself of when I'm feeling down, because..

Ain't nobody got time fo dat!