4 Days in PCH

I am not really ready to talk about this, but I will update everyone on what has happened in a factual manner. My feelings are still really raw and jaded, and I will never let them get in the way of taking care of my child. That being said, here are the facts.


Thursday afternoon (September 2) Dustin and I took Laila to the doctor for a check-up, she had been acting unlike herself lately. We have noticed gradually she has become more tired, ornery, and things didn't feel right. There were times she could barely keep her eyes open, and after 3 days of watching her struggle to eat, play, and be normal, we decided it was 3 too many and have things looked into. The doctor agreed she sounded heat exhausted, she is playing outside 3 times a day at school in 100+ degree temps, and she's been drinking lots of water and using the bathroom often. Thank heaven they didn't just let it go, they did a lab workup and tested her blood count, sugars, and thyroid.

Friday morning after I came home from grocery shopping I saw the doctor's office called me back to give me the results of her labs. It was confirmed Laila is a diabetic, her sugar levels were coming up over 500, which is dangerously high for someone her age and size. In addition to her losing weight, she has barely been eating and her little body has been working in overdrive to keep her safe. I had no idea, she's been the picture of health, she's never had more than a cold or sniffles, this was a complete shock to everyone.

Laila in PICU

Dustin had to pull her out of school and rush her to the Phoenix Children's Hospital emergency room. They admitted her and confirmed her blood sugar was still over 400, and they wouldn't feel comfortable until it was between 100-200. They set her up with an iv and started solution to get her feeling better, unfortunately, she could'nt eat. She was moved to the picu for the first night, where they checked her sugar levels every hour on the hour to confirm they were successfully dropping. Once she was able to eat again, they started administering her insulin shots to correct her blood sugar and to cover her carbohydrate intake. They moved her to a regular hospital room, where she spent 2 more nights.

We met with numerous nurses, two doctors, and a nutritionist. Everyone confirmed Laila will live a long, happy, healthy life, just one where her body depends on insulin her pancreas doesn't produce. So from that day forward, she will forever be an insulin dependent diabetic. Otherwise known as a type 1 diabetic. She receives at least 5 shots a day, one for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and bedtime, all fast acting (NovaLog) insulin, and one additional bedtime shot, a 24 hour slow release (Lantus), to help her highs not be so high, and her lows not be so low. At each meal time and bedtime, her sugar levels are checked, and corrected, and her carbs are covered to ensure her body breaks them down and uses them properly. She's doing very, very well and taking things one day at a time.

Her time in the hospital wasn't easy for anyone. Dustin barely left her side, other than to shower when I was there and to pee while she was sleeping. I had to make the hard choice to leave her and come home to care for Kenadi and Dustin Jr. Lots of sleepless hours and thousands of tears were shed, and I know I spent plenty of time wallowing in my sorrows and feeling sorry for myself, and I'm sure I wasn't the only one. I had to watch her drag an iv machine behind her to pee, struggle to hold a crayon with tubes coming out of her hands, and cry when she knew another shot was coming. She's grown up in the last week, it's amazing, to say the least. She is testing her own sugar, helping me portion foods and count carbs, and her understanding is far beyond her years.

I will leave you with this last little bit:

Laila enjoying a carb free snack

Laila, Dustin and I walked down to the cafeteria one afternoon to share a snack. There were a few display tables out with tri-fold project boards out and "shining stars" featured on each. Many kids made the"shining stars" board, which made me smile. All of those kids had one thing in common: cancer. Each child was photographed and wrote a little bio. Laila asked about the kids, and I did my best to explain in the most honest way possible. Those children were very, very sick, and may never get better and might never be able to go home. One day soon they will go to heaven, and their families will miss them very much. Like her, they never did anything wrong, and no one is mad at them, they are very loved and cared for. She took a few minutes to digest it, and though she moved on, she didn't forget a word I said.

Later that night, after I went home, Dustin tried explaining to Laila that she is, in fact, sick, even though she may not look or feel it. She needed to be in the hospital so she could be cared for and the nurses and doctors were there to help her feel her best. She responded like this: Daddy, I'm not sick, I get mosquito bites (shots) and I feel fine. There are other kids here who are sick, not me. The compassion radiating from her little 5 year old self is unlike anything I've ever seen. I can proudly say, she is my hero, I will continue to look up to her and strive to be like her every day. Who ever said your kids don't teach you things was wrong, Laila is the best teacher I will ever have.

Now that she is home, she doing great, the differences in her attitude, eating habits, and her body are amazing. She has put on abot 3 pounds already, which is making up for the 5 or so she lost. She is looking forward to going back to school on Monday, she misses her normal, daily routine. It's great to have her back to her old self, every day I thank God for her second chance.

Thank you all for your prayers and support. It will forever be appreciated.