Taxes, Surgery

I'm sitting here with the computer in my lap, surrounded by bills and tax documents. For some reason, when it rains, it pours. I'm stressed beyond belief, and this seems like it's just the beginning.

Back in 2007, Dustin and I filed our taxes and recieved a pretty nice refund, which we used to move us from Vegas down to our current home, Maricopa, AZ. Just months after getting settled in, purchasing furniture, decorating the kids rooms, and filling our pantry, we received a letter from the IRS. There was an issue with the way we filed our taxes, and 90% of the money we were refunded would need to be paid back. Boy, oh boy, that was going to be a problem.

We have literally been paying off those taxes for years, and finally this year managed to dump one lump sum into the last payment and felt as though a weight had been lifted. Finally! No more nasty-grams in the mail, no levy's on our bank account or Dustin's paychecks, and no more debt looming over our heads. Until today. We filed our taxes nearly a month ago and still haven't received our refund. Checking online weekly and making numerous calls has only brought us to the conclusion that our refund was altered, and would be here next week. Then the next. Then the next. Today, I opened the mail box and saw a letter from the IRS, and I was thrilled thinking it was a letter explaining our refund status, or even a refund check! I was wrong-disappointed and heartbroken. It was actually a letter stating we missed our payment from our monthly payment agreement! I came inside, settled down in the corner of the couch, and called the IRS yet again. As it turns out, they accepted our payment, and also deducted the full amout we owed (totalling $600!!!) out of our refund! So, double whammie-and double payment! What a bust! The lady "did a little research" as she called it and found the payment we made and applied it to our current refund, though it will be paid back to us at a later date and time. Whatever. As long as it finds its way to my house in the form of a big fat check with my name on it, I'm a happy camper.

To add to my mountains of stress, I received a phone call this morning from the hospital. Tomorrow morning is Dustin's surgery for the sacral dimple in his lower back. After packing, crying, arranging care for the girls, crying, praying, and crying some more, I finally felt ready for the day ahead. The hospital hasn't received confirmation from our insurance company that this surgery is necessary, and has been approved. Well, I received that letter today! Why it came to my house is beyond me, but getting through to that doctor's office is damn near impossible. I guess I'll have to take it with me at 5 am tomorrow. I must admit, I'm not as scared about the actual surgery as I am about his future. I know this surgery is necessary, and it will prevent many complications later in life, but I'm still a hot mess. In less than 6 months, my oldest daughter was diagnosed with diabetes, and my son now needs a pilonidal cyst removed. 2 hospital stays, many long nights away from my other kids and husband, and bills I'm not sure I'll ever be able to afford.

Tonight, I'm dropping my girls off at my friend Michelle's house and I won't see them for days. Tomorrow, I'm leaving my son's life in the hands of another. I wonder if I'll ever run out of tears.